MEN AND WOMEN ARE DIFFERENT When you walk into a Department store if your a man, you go to the Men's Department...simple, easy.....sizing for men is standard by waist, chest and neck size. When you look for women's clothes there is a Juniors , Misses and Women's sections. WHY WOMEN HAVE TO TRY ON CLOTHES I will use Khol's as an example, there are 11 DIFFERENT DESIGNER'S in just the Misses department alone. There are no standard measurements among women's clothes designers, if Vera Wang designs a size 8 the fit will be totally different fit from Jennifer Lopez's designs size 8. This means there are 11 different versions of a misses size 8 in Khols. Talk to any woman, ask her how frustrating this is and how much of her free time she spends trying on clothes!! SELF WORTH Last year even though I dropped 30lbs and so many inches of body fat from crossfitting, clothes shopping was still emotionally hard. I associated what size I was with my self worth. I felt if I had to go up a size in a pair of jeans instead of the new size I had worked so hard to become this was "bad or ugly". Very often I walked out of the store without buying anything and feeling depressed. As a result I had very few clothes. This year I was taking my daughter to college orientation and I desperately needed to buy clothes to wear because I had hardly any! I tried on the first outfit it was a cute sun dress in a misses size 8, well the waist fit but I could not zip up the side zipper once it hit the beginning of my ribs...grrr!! I riped that dress off over my head, threw it on the ground, was just about to jump on it in defeat, when I stopped and gave myself a reality check! "Elisa, your body is soo different now from crossfitting for 18 months now, your back is wider from lifting heavy weights, your butt is rounder and your thighs are thicker because you squat so much, your arms are more powerful....you actually have 'guns', DO NOT EXPECT ONE SIZE to fit your new body!" A NEW PERSPECTIVE
I picked up that dress that I was just about to attack. Now armed with my new way of thinking, hung it on the hanger, left the dressing room to look for a bigger size. I promised myself I would not feel bad or ashamed to go up in size, but learn how to fit clothes to my body. I did end up purchasing that dress in a size 12 , because it was the size that fit my back comfortably. Seeing how the dress fit my body properly, truly helped me put away those old notions of having to fit into a particular size to be pretty or accepted. I realized that I am so much more than a size tag on a dress. I have become fit, healthy and strong because of Crossfit. I now dress my body not by what designers put on the tag but by how clothes fit. I want my clothes to reflect on the outside how I feel on the inside....STRONG AND BEAUTIFUL!
"you are a strong and dedicated woman who will not let this incident keep you from reaching your goals .keep up the Pr's and don't stop posting them so we can all celebrate your achievements together. keep moving forward" Keith K THANK YOU TO ALL OF YOU ..Family, Friends, my PortCrossfit Family, my fellow crossfitters, blog readers ..who have sent me your words of encouragement and support, it means so much to me and is important to my healing, I LOVE YOU! KIDS My oldest Kaite has become my caretaker making sure my wounds were cleaned and dressed, made sure i ate and took my antibiotics, allowed me to sleep, did my errands for me, whatever i needed, she has done for me. The day after the attack Erin, had her second High School Varsity Softball playoff game. It was everything within me to get up, shower and drive (in pain) to her game to watch her play. When they lost, the other girls on her team cried and ignored their parents, Erin came running over "I love you mommy, i am so glad your here!" with a hug and a kiss. She has held me many times as i cried and told me it was OK not to be strong, that it was OK for me to let them (the kids) help me. My oldest and my youngest would come up with a paleo meals that they would cook together. Mike would beam with pride when I would say "Good choice Mike!" My son has also armed me with an arsenal of weapons...a bat, a knife and samurai swords so that i can protect myself from any dog or Superhero Nemesis. Now if i could just get them to clean the house life would be perfect, hahahaha. I LOVE YOU KAITE, ERIN and MIKE "to infinity and beyond!!" EVERYDAY STUFF This week (6/10/2013) brings quite a few firsts for me. I have woken up hungry, actually ate all 3 meals and my snack, i had been sub existing on only 2 meals and a snack. I have been keeping my eating "clean" as we say in crossfit. Clean eating is KEY to my healing both physically and mentally. I have recently started sleeping without any nightmares. I have finally worked up to 7 hours of straight sleep. It feels great to wake up happy and rested both mentally and physically. I am more confident to venture outside and do my own errands. This is also the first week i can lift my patient at work without pain, my pediatric patient cannot move by himself, he is 100lbs of dead weight...caring for him injured has been a challenge to say the least. Little by little, step by step, i am making progress in feeling like myself again. CROSSFIT It is difficult to crossfit with both a arm and leg injury, both on the same side. It is also hard to accept because of your injury you need to scale down your weights. The day after the attack i couldn't even pick up a coffee cup, i had no grip strength, and my leg was painful just sitting. It was mentally and physically overwhelming just to get up out of bed and thru the doors at PortCrossfit. My first class on Tuesday (5/28/2013), was surreal, i felt like i was moving in slow motion and everyone else was moving at lightening speed. I left class feeling apathetic, that scared me! I was thinking the whole drive home "am i going to ever feel normal again? " In Wednesday's (5/29/2013) class we had to do Turkish get-ups , i was having difficulty gripping the kettlebell, and had to scale the weight down. In the middle of the WOD , I just wanted to quit, I was thinking "this is too hard for me, I cant do this" and I contemplated running out the door! I have NEVER, EVER felt that way, even when I first started! Thru these self-defeating thoughts, I hear my coach (thanks Mike!) say "Right back up, Elisa!"...reluctantly I got up, finished. "Seriously Elisa, you wanted to quit?", I am thinking to myself and crying the whole way home. I took a day off to rest and it scared me that I didn't miss crossfit. Friday's (5/31/2013) class we begin the WOD with building to a heavy hang squat clean, I was encouraged because I was able to get to 85lbs, not my heaviest, it hurt to squat, but it was a weight I felt I could accept from myself. After that we had to do 5 rounds for time of 200 meter run, 15 hand release push ups, 15 power cleans. I take 20lbs off my bar, drop down to 65lbs and give myself a pep talk. " OK Elisa this is a weight you warm up with, your 1 rep max is 105lbs, you can do this" 3-2-1 -GO! I run..my legs feel like lead, i do modified push ups, then i get to the power cleans i break the 15 reps into workable sets of 5. As I am running my second round i seriously considered dropping my weight, because the 65lbs felt exceptionally heavy to me but then the fighter in me FINALLY stepped up and said "NO Elisa, you can do this, you did the first 15!" I didn't care if PortCrossfit was turning off the lights and locking the place up, i was not giving up, i was going to finish! I ran in from my fifth round, did my 15 hand-release push ups, now on to the power cleans 15 reps to finish, at this point everyone else in the class is done! I do the first 5 of my final set, my grip is failing, i throw the bar down, i hear my coach (Tyler)"YOU got this 10, 9, 8, 7, 6,5, 4, 3, 2, 1...Pick Up The Bar, 5 more, 10 to finish!! ", I can hear everyone in class cheering me on! I can only hold the bar for three more reps, down it goes, it is so hard for me to hold, I pick the bar up again for 3 more reps, again my grip fails..."You got this Elisa, break it into sets of 2" from my coach, that's what I do. With the last completed rep, I throw down the bar, i uncontrollably start sobbing, and walk out of class into the parking lot. One of my friends comes out after me "Elisa, are you OK?" and she gives me a hug..i start crying again "yes, Linds, these are happy tears, i didn't give up or give in, and i finished!" I didn't even record my time for that day, I didn't care. What mattered to me is that i didn't give up, I had a "normal" reaction in class and that is a PR. Last week(6/3/2013) I was able to PR my strict overhead press, do banded pull ups, and I took Olympic lifting class like I usually do. This week (6/10/2013) I have been able to do knees to chest all unbroken reps without losing my grip, do a triple heavy push jerk very close to my one rep max, and swing a 1.25 pood (44-45lbs) kettle bell, it hurt to go overhead but i was able to get it eye level without pain. Each small improvement whether its everyday stuff or crossfit, brings me closer to healing and that keeps me so encouraged that my life will get back to normal. I just have to hang in there, keep my eyes on my faith, and keep moving forward and not give up!
I COULD DIE On Tuesday of this past week i was attacked by a pit bull. I walked from my apartment to my Landlords door, knocked, stepped back from the door and waited for him to answer. I was waiting patiently so i could tell him the washing machine was broken, instead i listened to his pit bull go crazy barking, growling, and jumping at the door. I was just about to walk a away..the dog busted down the door and i was facing the jaws of a hostile territorial pit bull. Before i could blink the pit bull ran up and attacked me ..i felt its teeth rip into my arm, I wondered if the beast broke my arm, it quickly disappeared behind me and i felt the piercing of its fangs in my leg...the animal then circled to the front of me. "OH MY GOD, I could die at the hands of this dog! I am going to have to fight for my life", I thought. In an instant I could feel my TERROR rise up from the pit of my stomach consume my senses, and i wanted to RUN. Suddenly I heard my father's voice "when an dog becomes aggressive BE STILL". KEEP CALM I grew up with a Dad who was not only a Park Ranger but he used to breed and train dogs to hunt. In this terrifying moment i had to trust his advice that he gave me as a little girl. I began to talk to myself ..."you are not allowed to panic, the dog can sense your fear, you need to just breathe..inhale and exhale slowly, relax your body so the dog perceives you as non- threatening" That Crossfit switch flipped in my head, where you know you can go past the pain, past your fear and I began to breathe to decompress just like i do right before i hear my coaches in crossfit say "3-2-1-GO!" I felt my body start loosen, I kept my eyes on the canine but kept my gaze lowered and i felt my severe anxiety start to recede . "OK Elisa, just breathe, you can do this, keep calm, think!" I start to pray "OK Lord, i am all alone here, there is no one ...no neighbours, no landlord, i don't even have my phone to call 911, no one can hear me, i have no weapons, .....i really need you to get the dog to back down. Please I don't want to die like this" "KEEP BREATHING, Elisa, KEEP CALM" STRATEGY
In Crossfit I approach the WODS (workout of the day) by strategies how i will break down the workload into manageable sets so that i can finish. I am thinking to myself "hmmm this animal weighs 50-75lbs", with that i began to remember how much i can lift overhead in crossfit, i realized i am stronger than this beast, and i do stand a fighting chance against this aggressive pit bull. The savage constantly growled but backed up to its front door(exactly what i just prayed for). I took a chance, with malicious animal watching me , i moved a toe length backwards.... I stood still,counted to 30, and noticed the creature did not become anymore belligerent. I repeated this pattern of movement til i reached my front door. I ripped the door to my apartment and grabbed paper towels to stop the bleeding and sobbed uncontrollably. My daughter Kaite just looked at me bewildered, "What happened to you?" THE AFTERMATH My first instinct was to keep calm and carry on...that's what crossfitters, moms, nurses do...right? My daughter Kaite temporarily dressed my bleeding wounds and i didn't want her to miss crossfit...so i demanded amidst my sobs to go to crossfit. Kaite, was able to talk me down from the ledge and convinced me to go to the hospital to be examined....can anyone say shock? I know by the Grace OF GOD I am blessed to have all my limbs, no chunks of muscle missing and i walked away with my life, but I was truly naive to think i would be OK. I never expected to have difficulty sleeping, nightmares, anxiety, panic attacks, feel overwhelmed just by doing simple chores around the house, difficulty concentrating, mood swings, not laugh or smile, have no appetite, want to sleep all the time, not want to leave my apt, I startle every time i hear the pit bull barking, not want to talk on the phone, to name a few of the symptoms i have. I am even afraid to Crossfit..its the fear of not knowing what i will i be able to do, i have an injured arm and leg! I know my physical and psychological injuries will take time to heal...its just hard for me i am used to being the nurse not the patient, the mom who takes care of everyone else not the one who needs to be taken care of, the friend who listens not the one who needs listening to, the experienced crossfitter who encourages everyone else not the one who will need the encouragement just to walk thru the door. I am a survivor, I will get thru all this stuff , my mom always said "what doesn't kill you makes you stronger" and she is right! I have a strong Faith in God, "I can do all things thru Christ who strengthens me" Philippians 4:13...Yes I can.
I was reading this past Wednesdays PortCrossfit Blog, cringing at what torture awaited me, when i read the following line and i had to laugh. "On Monday when I was coaching class I had a few tentative members (I won’t name names) who didn’t want to try a less resistant band, but then with a little kick in the rear they were able to knock out pullups on that thinner band." Coach Tyler Le Floch I can tell you from experience that swift kick in the rear by PortCrossfit coaches are a great sign of your ability to advance. I am so grateful for those times when I have had sneaker prints on my butt! BOX JUMPS When i started at PortCrossfit, i could not jump a box. The coaches started me on step -ups onto 3 plates, progressed me to step-ups on the 12 inch box, and then i started jumping. I am cruising along months later jumping comfortably on the 12 inch box when in class one day Coach Kyle turns around and says to me "you can jump the box and a weight plate" (which totals 14inches in height). I kid you not when i say, I felt like I was going to throw up, I know my heart stopped and my face probably looked like this!
Yup, guys this was my first swift kick in the ass!By pushing me out my comfort zone my coach forced me to face my fear that would block my development as a crossfitter and he showed me i was physically ready to tackle moving forward.
MONDAY NIGHTS CLASS In the last couple of weeks in class we have been doing alot of chin-up/pull-up/muscle-up skill work. Two weeks ago we were doing strict pull-up skill work and our coach wanted us to challenge ourselves by trying doing pull-ups on less resistance bands..i used thick black (i only started using this band on march 2, 2013 during Portcrossfit throw down) thick green and thin green..all progressive steps towards my goal which is a pull-up without bands by the end of this year. Then 1 week ago in Mondays nights class with Coach Tyler, I used thick green for 8 reps, thin green for 6 reps..i could only do 4 in a row, rested a couple of seconds then do the 2 more to make the 6, and then i did the 4 reps. I went to use the thin green for the last set which was 2 reps, and I hear "ELISA!! Didn't you just do 4 on that band?" ....oh yeah folks here it comes ....the kick in the ass...so i crack up laughing and i said a meek "yes". Coach Tyler comes walking towards me with a smaller band...not just the next step down in resistance but TWO steps down in resistance so this means I am pulling more of my own body weight up to the pull-up rig to get my chin over the bar!! In those seconds I am thinking "HE is absolutely CRAZY if he thinks I can do pull-ups on that thin blue band!" I exclaim out loud to my coach, "A THIN BLUE BAND??!!" Coach hands me the band and says, "Yeah, you can do this" and steps back. I finish hooking up the thin blue band to the pull-up rig and I take a deep breath. Now I am giving myself a pep talk...." OK Elisa, just try it, the worst that can happen is you can't do one on this level band, your coach thinks you can do this, go for it!" Wouldn't you know I did the last 2 reps in a row on that thin blue band! Coach comes over gives me a high-five and i welled up with happy tears...WOW, I DID IT! Yes, without those sneaker prints on my butt i would have never tried that level of resistance band. POWER CLEANS Last Tuesday we had to do heavy power cleans , 1 repetition rest 10 seconds, again for three more repetitions for 5 sets. I work up to 85lbs which now for me is a comfortable weight. I increase my weight to 90lbs and mistakenly i did 2 touch and go power cleans. I was praying my coach did not just see me do that. I hear Coach Kyle.."If you can touch and go with your power cleans ..YOU NEED TO ADD WEIGHT!!"....as he walks over to me...smiles and says "add 5lbs!" Yup, sneaker applied to butt and I add the weight, so now i am lifting 95lbs. My maxium power clean is 105lbs but that is only 1 repetition...I now have to do 95lbs 16 times...I am SCARED! Can i really do this? Will i be too tired to lift all this weight? Am i really this strong? With each repetition I focus on setting up with good form, not on my doubt or my fear. Yeah you guessed it, I did every one of those Power Cleans, and realized I am really that STRONG! PROGRESS When the coaches ask you to try a new skill, its because they know you can do it, and its time to move you forward to the next skill level. I know its scary, but the joy in trying is immense, failing forces you to work harder, and succeeding is unspeakable happiness. Embrace that kick in the arse! "Every day you may make progress. Every step may be fruitful. Yet there will stretch out before you an ever-lenghtening, ever ascending, ever-improving path. You know you will never get to the end of the journey. But this, so far from discouraging, only adds to the joy and the glory of the climb." Sir Winston Churchill
So how are all the competitor's for ECTD 2.0 doing? We are now into week 3! I have read and heard numerous complaints , alot moaning and groaning over changes we have had to make..... Myself included!! So how do we continue to stay on track and cut out the moaning and groaning? WHY? When i am craving another cup of coffee, a beer, or chicken cutlet Parmesan? I think of WHY did i want to change? So stop and think for a moment what motivated you to do the ECTD challenge? What makes you want to change? Is your reason .... maybe you want to look awesome naked, fit back into your super hero outfit, maybe claim the ECTD 2.0 title( you know you want my tiara and ectd sash), or is it to audition for Magic Mike 2? Write down your reason on a post it note attach it to your mirror, your fridge, and your wallet so you will constantly remind yourself why your suffering to change! GOALS! So you want to change, I applaud your efforts ! What are going to do with the changes you have made? I don't know about you but if i am giving up my beloved caffeine fix aka coffee then i want something to show for it! I have my mind set on a Goal! What steps will you make to achieve that goal? Do you want to be a superhero, or try out with the flying trapeze act at the circus after getting your first muscle up or is it going on a date with Eva Longoria (team flo-ringer might be able to help you out with that one)? First visualize yourself achieving your goal, write it down, break your goal down into reachable steps you need to achieve to accomplish your goal, finally keep working at your goal til you attain it! WHAT IS MY WHY? MY GOAL? The Justice League called....said the original Wonder Woman is retiring. I need to be able to fit in my new superhero uniform!
THE NEWS On Monday April 8, 2013 all of us participating in PortCrossfit's Eat Clean Train Dirty Challenge 2.0 received an email in which it stated, "Females to be measured need to wear a sports bra and shorts" .....I swear i heard every women at PCF gasp!! Then my phone just started to explode! PANDORA'S BOX My initial reaction was "oh shit, i don't even own a pair of workout shorts...FOR A REASON PEOPLE!!" Then i decided to do what the "tough" girls do and go SHOPPING!! I figured if i had to be measured (GROAN) i would do it in typical "Elisa Fashion"!! As i am shopping at Dick's Sporting Goods, in of course the Reebok section...i am getting FB messages, texts and phone calls of distress from other PCF ladies!
MY ADVICE Listen Ladies getting measured sucks! None of us like doing this! Lets remember a few things... 1. YOU are MORE than your measurements, a dress or pants size or a number on the scale!! YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL ROCK IT!! 2. You joined crossfit to change, working out and what you eat are key to being healthy and a better Crossfitter...so use this paleo challenge as a tool! 3. Our Coaches, just by looking at you(workout gear doesn't leave much to the imagination ladies) can GUESS pretty accurately how much you weigh, what your body fat is without measuring you because this is their JOB! Sooo Ladies they already know! 4. Focus on ALL that you HAVE accomplished so far in crossfit not what you have not! 5. get a manicure, pedicure, a new outfit, a new bra & new panties from Victoria's (don't wear it to be measured in please!) , SOMETHING that will make you feel PRETTY , then get measured! If that doesn't help, Drinking alot of alcohol works , but make sure you have a designated driver! Hey is any of that Drunken watermelon left from the PCF BBQ? 6. I can guarantee that our coaches are NOT lying awake at night texting each other saying "can you believe the body fat on that one? hehehe" Listen I have it on a good source that Ryan is lying awake at night trying to figure out diabolical ways to torture us, Kyle is working on his one-liners for each class and figuring out how to make us at PCF into a reality show, Tyler is updating his play lists on spotify hoping to be the "David Guetta" of the Crossfit (World Wide) Community, and Mike is just trying to figure out how to keep the 7pm class organized cause they all have ADD! They are busy ladies !! 7. I can PROMISE you, our coaches are discreet, sympathetic, understanding and will treat you will respect when measuring!! and yes tissues will be supplied if necessary! Seriously I do remember what it was like to be measured by my coach last year for ECTD, how i took pictures in my bikini in support ( which i posted on my blog, and those pictures had to be verified by my coach, oh that was fun) for the Luroung Paleo challenge...how embarrassed and humiliated i felt because now my coaches KNEW my measurements...but each time i learned something new about myself, each was a challenge i met and all of those experiences made me grow as a person and a crossfitter! YOU CAN DO THIS LADIES!! WE ARE CROSSFIT STRONG!! LIVE BOLD!!
OH so what did i choose...booty shorts or a skort to be measured in? lmao you will just have to stay tuned!
If your my Facebook friend or follow me on Twitter or Instagram , you know i now have all 3 of my children Crossfitting with me. This picture is after our first wod together , me in blue, my son mike, my daughter kaite and my daughter erin in yellow. My favorite part of the week is crossfitting with my kids! I LOVE IT! SETTING THE EXAMPLE When i started Crossfit 14 months ago i never thought my children would even think of trying Crossfit. I would hobble (from muscle soreness) to my door and they would help me up the stairs...and ask "why are you doing this mom?" If i tried to talk about Crossfit and what i did there i would get the eye rolling looks, they would tell me to "please stop talking about Crossfit, you talk about it like its your boyfriend or something" I changed along the way...i became happier, i looked better, ate healthier, had more energy...and my kids took notice. I wanted to enter my first ever PortCrossfit Challenge "Eat Clean Train Dirty"...i asked my kids what do you think, they told me that i was doing great so far to keep going..take on the challenge! This is when Mike my 17 yr old son asked if he could do Crossfit also. Mike started in July 2012. Then i entered a beginner competition in August 2012 called Festivus at Crossfit 516..all 3 of my kids were there cheering me on in their "we love our Crossfit momma" t-shirts, and that's when Erin said "i would like to try crossfit too". Kaite my 22yr old.... yeah.. well, she was the last man standing and finally joined in February of this year. MIKE I worried as my son grew older how i would be able to relate to him, he is a boy, what do i know about being a boy? Crossfit gives me that chance to stay connected to him. We have something in common to talk about..the pain of the wod, the PR of a lift, funny things the coaches say. Crossfittting together has kept the door open for him to tell me whats on his mind. In the fall Mike would work out in the gym after school with friends and show them what he did in crossfit. "Mom" he said laughing my friends think Crossfit is "too hardcore for them" I replied "so they think your badass"... "yup" he said with a huge grin. I have seen my "boy" become more conscious about eating healthier foods, I have seen him grow more confident in himself, and now i see him becoming much stronger, developing more muscle...looking more grown up and manly. ERIN
Erin is 18 yrs old, and an athlete so her transition into Crossfit was easier. She is competitive by nature and always tries to out Crossfit me...i love that she sees me as her benchmark. Erin also has started to change the way she eats by making healthier choices, and i have seen her gain greater confidence in her body and how she feels she looks. Teenagers tend shut their parents out at times but after the WOD at Crossfit i find Erin just unloads all her emotions and wants to talk to me. Erin's catching, and hitting coach told her that in the short time she has been Crossfitting she has become much stronger, has more endurance and has greater speed... the Coach said "DON'T STOP CROSSFITTING....YOUR A MUCH BETTER ATHLETE" KAITE Kaite is my princess. She was not athletic in high school, doesn't like to sweat or lift anything heavy...she has been my biggest surprise. She had tried 1 beginner class in Nov of last year but that was as far as she got. Then she moved in with me full time, and she said she wanted to try Crossfit again. So this time i see Kaite planning each week when she is going to crossfit, cooking healthy meals, and i see her really giving an effort in crossfit class. I am so PROUD and HAPPY for her, i feel like with my other 2 kids this will give kaite a chance to develop self confidence. Last week i wish i could have taken a picture of her smile after she landed a lift called the Split Jerk like a pro! It was a smile of awakening...wow i did that all by myself. I hope to see more smiles like that on Kaite's face! Kaite recently signed up for PortCrossfit's Eat Clean Train Dirty 2.0 challenge. What she said to me is "mom i hear the voice of doubt in my head but then i remember you took a chance in last yrs challenge and you were the female winner and i realize i have nothing to lose and everything to gain" OH YES I AM DOING A HAPPY DANCE!!
TODAY Mike and i did Olympic lifting class and he nailed a huge Personal Record (PR) 125lb clean and jerk while all the guys and coaches cheered him on ...he did that lift just last week and hit 105lbs. He told me in the car he saw me hit my PR at 90lbs last week and knew he had to do better than his mom...lmao. Erin and i did the regular class today and as we were hanging on the pull up rig doing pull ups, then hit the floor to do push ups...i turned to her and said, "Erin, we couldn't have found a "nice " mother daughter activity, like quilting? whose idea was this?" she laughed "yours ma". Then Erin said" i missed crossfit sooo much ma, damn softball games!" Kaite unfortunately was home sick today but she said "i feel so left out every one's going to crossfit!" I truly am blessed that my healthy lifestyle has now become my children's too! MORE HAPPY DANCING!!
